Newgrounds.com — Everything, By Everyone.
Age/Gender: 21, Male
Location: Hawaii
Job: Firefighter Trainee
I'll live each day as if it were my last, not living as if I have nothing to live for, but living to have everyone to live for! I will train hard every every day for if one faithful day should arrives where even for a brief moment I needed, I'll be ready.
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All Audio Reviews
277 Reviews | 158 w/ Responses
It's almost perfect for a scene of love, or perhaps even a moment of fear.
It seems to move the sense of peace.
The wolves sounds in the background don't seem to relate to anything in particular, but it does add a nice touch.
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Kinda like Coldplay in a sense.
You kinda lost it at around 20 seconds.
But it gets productively better as it plays.
It could afford to be a little in sync,
But suddenly it speeds up around 55 seconds and then slows down.
Keep good tempo...but that's simply with practice
Keep at it! You're only getting better even when it doesn't seem like it.
Author's Response:
thanks for another very helpful review! again, this is unfinished. it will get better when it's finished.
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"Not bad! allow me to be the first reviewer."
What needs work on...
Your voice is ALMOST THERE...but
Your voice overpowers the musical instruments. The Bass seems like it needs to be the strongest instrument...it's soft beats will add a nice touch to the music.
The guitar's plucking is a little off..ex. around 1:20 minutes
It starts off a little weak at first....but after about a minute you start getting into the flow of it.
That guitar thing after 2:00 and again after 2:33 minutes needs some work...doesn't really accompany with the rest of the song....sort of.... distracting
What is good....
The lyrics
The soft beginning and ending.
I can almost envision a music video.
-JBK
Author's Response:
hey, thanks!
again, our band will try to work on the bass and plucking, and if it's still on our mixer, we'll remaster the vocals.
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Your really in tune with each other.
Your voice is also in good tone.
But just before 57 seconds it sounds a little bit complicated. And that note you held wasn't quite steady.
Obviously you could still make improvements on this...but it does sound good.
However, sounding good and keeping good smoothness is another situation.
Some of the instruments I feel like they don't belong, but it can work if you know how long and when during the song you can play them.
Around 3:00 minutes it sounds wierd
again around 3:27...it jumbles...like you messed up the rhythm.
3:50 guitar solo should be longer
Overall Very satisfied with the song.
Be sure to include the lyrics, I'm sure people will want to know what your sing about.
Author's Response:
thanks again for another detailed review and your critisism!
actually, the reason the drums got messed up is because antoine, our drummer, dropped a drumstick around 3:20 when he was laying down his drum tracks, so i had to run over there and give it to him. i was the one monitoring the drum tracks at that point, so i had to leave my spot and rush over there, which is something i will hardly do because i have to make sure the tracks don't overdo their peak point. (mixer term XP)
thanks again!
also, to anyone who wants the lyrics, here they are:
she said she loved another boy, and dreamt of him to her alloy, i laid there with a solemn frown, it was never the same since he came around. i was so depressed and overwhelmed, i felt like i was drowning in a well, and with myself i was in a fight over if i'd even make it through the night.
my heart was never one for envy, not even in a journal entry. but this was an exception now, to all my friends i wondered how they could even care about someone like me, it was just so hard to see, cause she said she loved another boy, and dreamt of him to her alloy.
she says he's hot, i bet he is, but the truth of the matter is: i need her more and more at night, i closed my eyes and turned off the light.
i never thought that i'd live through the days at school were i never knew if i'd even be here the next day, if it wasn't worth it, i'd have taken it all away. away for good, with a faint smile, sarcastic so it lasts for hardly a while, so fake it now, mess it up, with her gone, i didn't even know which way was up.
i never really believed in ghosts...ressurection's what i see most.
because she said she loved another boy and dreamt of him to her alloy...
she says he's hot, i bet he is, but the truth of the matter is: i need her more and more at night, i closed my eyes and turned off the light.
(breakdown)
she says he's hot, i bet he is, but the truth of the matter is: i need her more and more at night, i closed my eyes and turned off the light.
she says she wants his lips on hers, but finally now, i'm over those words. i put my depressed thoughts away, i know i'll fall in love someday.
overall, this song is about overcoming depression.
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Learn to keep in rhythm, a good exercise is to immitate each other's movements as if you were looking in a mirror. Eventually you'll be insync. I know it sounds wierd and maybe a little gay, but it might just work.
Fix that clash of sounds around 1:30...too clashey.
As for your sing, you seem to have a weak voice, it starts off strong, but it seems like your running out of breath.
To increase your voice power, SPEAK UP! If the teacher calls you to answer the question, be sure you've studied and speak the answer with CONFIDENCE! but no arrogance, speak fluently and smoothly and handsomely!
Sing to your favorite bands out-loud while alone in your room, and listen to yourself and your favorite singer. Eventually you'll train your voice on your own.
If you want to increase your breathing potential...Warm Tea seems to help, take a sip, and breath. I prefer Mint Tea (Really soothes the lungs and nose).
Practice a type of breathing Exercise you can learn in Tai Chi or Yoga, slow deep breaths, and slow exhale through lungs or stomach.
Lungs control how long you can hold a note, stomach controls how high or low your voice is. Learning how to breath will give you control of your voice.
The Band plays their instruments just fine...the problems is your NOT In-Synce!
And if you want to keep your lungs healthy, drink plenty of water to clear your body of Crud, and DON'T under any circumstance take up drugs.
You've got what it takes, but there's no rush...Rome wasn't built in a day, and neither is greatness...
For true Greatness is Patient, Yet Everlasting, You take the present with enjoyment, and enjoy learning and improving, NEVER RUSH! Take your time, and you'll soon see your' moving WAY TOO FAST! ^^
Good luck! (shaka)
Author's Response:
thanks for the detailed review, i'll work on it! ^_^
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"Be sure to play this Gig on the day of Ragnarock"
It has that Viking HEavy Metal feel.
Perfect for when Ragnarock arrives! ^^
Author's Response:
I have an agreement with Odin...
Thanks for your review!
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"This would be perfect for Ravers & fans of Starwar"
I can imagine a Starwars convention with a section Dance Hall!
None of that dumb stuff like those dorks comparing you to their costumes.
But rather a Dance hall for people who just want to jam in their Jabber Waki Suits.
Do the Robot as C3PO.
Realistic Drinks that are creative and Bizarre like those from the movies.
Alien Girls dancing in Caves.
And Rave light glow sticks could be replaced with mini light-sabers.
It's all in my mind...and now that I expressed the idea to Newgrounds...it'll only be a matter of time before some rich dude decides to buy the rights to hold night clubs with a Starwars Theme.
Author's Response:
<.< >.>
you better copyright that idea! haha i can see that idea made into a flash as well.
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"Is it in the game by chance?"
I would make good music for a chase scene.
Then again...it sounds something I would hear in a Megaman X series game.
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It's very pleasant...calm...yet also becomes quite catchy in rhythm.
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"Find myself floating in space...."
it sure is peaceful...watching galaxies float by...
That's what this music reminds me of.
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